Major embarrassment

A Senior Sergeant Major from the Border Patrol Police received a lesson in how victims of crime feel after an encounter with three attractive young women in Thung Song, Nakhon Sri Thammarat province. Officers from Thung Song Police Station were called to the JS Hotel. There, waiting for them wearing full dress uniform and a sorrowful expression, was Sgt Maj Somneuk (name changed for reasons that will become apparent). He related a tale of woe to his colleagues from the thin brown line. He had been shopping in the local market, he said, when three pretty women aged between 25 and 30 drove by in a yellow Toyota. He then saw them pull up a little way in front. He walked over and applied all the charm that police worldwide are renowned for. It worked; the three women agreed to go for lunch with him. Sgt Maj Somneuk couldn’t believe his luck when, after they had chatted for an hour or so, one of the women suggested they should all meet at the the nearby JS Hotel and continue the conversation in more intimate style. On the other hand, the 45-year-old Senior Sergeant Major reasoned, what women could resist the fine figure of a Border Patrol Policeman in full uniform? When the beaming cop walked up to the hotel he was a little disappointed to find that two of the women had somehow disappeared. But reasoning that a bird in the hotel room is still better than three around a lunch table, he went upstairs with the remaining beauty. At this point, all training and experience he had gained from his work in the élite Border Patrol unit must have abandoned him. He allowed himself to fall for one of the oldest tricks in the book. His temptress companion insisted that he have a shower before they took their conversation to more carnal levels, so he eagerly ripped off his uniform, along with his gold chain and Buddha image and a gold ring, and dived into the bathroom. Emerging a few minutes later fresh and clean, he found the woman had disappeared and, perhaps not surprisingly, so had his jewelry. He dressed rapidly and rushed down to reception, where he was told that his temporary beloved had been picked up by her friends in the Toyota only a couple of minutes earlier. After reporting the incident to his brother officers at the scene Sgt Maj Somneuk – apparently unable to face the embarrassment of going to the police station – decided that he would rather not take matters further, and drove off.

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Archiving articles from the Phuket Gazette circa 1998 - 2017. View the Phuket Gazette online archive and Digital Gazette PDF Prints.

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